I’ve been on the low
I been taking my time
I feel like I’m out of my mind
It feel like my life ain’t mine
Who can relate?

My little brother introduced me to an artist. His name is Logic. His message for his followers is simple: peace, love, and positivity. It’s a message I didn’t know I needed to hear at that moment. His performance at VMAs only confirmed what I already knew: he’s just amazing. He’s not only an amazing artist, but just the fact that he’s making music with a specific message is incredible and something not seen often in today’s music culture.

I’ve had a complicated relationship with the idea of suicide. I’ve witnessed communities affected first-hand by an individual who committed suicide. Suicide isn’t just taking your life. It’s a process. It’s a state of mind in which someone feels as though dying is a better option than living, that their life isn’t worth living, that they aren’t worth the breath left in their body. Suicide has two sides: those committing or potentially committing the act and their loved ones. The rest of the community, quite frankly, doesn’t know what that individual is going through or what their family is going through.

I used to think that suicide was selfish, that the person who committed suicide didn’t think about the people he or she would hurt by refusing to live. I don’t know what changed in me. Though I can still empathize with the sentiment, I have begun to understand the other complex emotions experienced in relation to this controversial topic.

Sometimes you get in your own head and stay there. Nothing and no one can pull you out. Only you can. That will to get out of your head has to be there. That ability to get out of your head has to be there. Sometimes we humans feel completely alone, as if all we have is ourselves, as if no one else can understand what we’ve been through. It is difficult to pin down, but it’s different than being selfish. It’s almost an inability to think about anything else, an inability to feel like things will get better. It leaves you in a constant state of despair and helplessness.

Although it got mixed reviews, I felt that 13 Reasons Why conveyed an amazing and honest portrayal of what goes on in someone’s head while contemplating suicide. Though I don’t feel that everyone else in your life can be specifically blamed, I do believe that the final act is a culmination of many thoughts and issues never fully addressed, leaving the person worse off than where they started.

I want you to be alive
I want you to be alive
You don’t gotta die today
You don’t gotta die
I want you to be alive
I want you to be alive
You don’t gotta die
Now lemme tell you why

This isn’t to say that I believe in anything but life. I believe that all human beings deserve life and self-worth. Logic’s message resonated with me because I heard something that helps me in my daily life: hope. Hope is an antidote that some way, somehow things will get better than they are now.


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