For granted

This week has been…rough.

One of my coworkers unexpectedly passed away earlier this week. We didn’t know until he didn’t show up to work on Monday. He was my age…

We weren’t on the same team, but we sat near each other. We talked all the time about the most random shit. He LOVED Marvel and comics and the Avengers. Truthfully, I didn’t know many important things about his life, so I wouldn’t go as far as to call him my friend, but he was there and all of a sudden, he wasn’t.

I took for granted that he would show up to work and that we would talk. I never thought that one day he just wouldn’t show up. I never thought that one day I would have to look at his empty desk and know that he wasn’t able to come back.

A part of me feels…guilty. Earlier this week, I was upset over things that don’t even matter anymore. I keep thinking how blessed I am that these are my problems. I can’t imagine what his family is going through right now. I can’t imagine how my coworkers who were closer to him are coping. I can’t even look at his desk.

As much as I knew him, he was a pretty great guy and I don’t think anyone deserves to go so early. I don’t know what else to think, say, feel.

Rest in peace.

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